TELL ME THE TRUTH

 

Entered the home and closed the door as if she wanted to leave the whole night behind. They were going to have a family dinner and spend a nice evening together. However, whatever happened, the dinner was ruined again. It started well initially. Until her brother started talking about his work problems... He had been finding temporary solutions to his ongoing issues for a while. Zahara could see the problem better from an outsider's perspective. She could see how her brother was making this problem complicated. Wasn't it always like this?

When you live the problem, you struggle to see the real problem.

And when you can't see the real problem, you can't come up with a real solution.

They had been discussing this issue at family gatherings for a long time, and Zahara kept pointing out similar points. "Debts breed debts." "Wouldn't it be better to reduce company expenses?" "You shouldn't consume with the partners you're in production with." But her brother didn't pay attention. So Zahara repeated the same things with a bit of weariness. All she wanted was to help and find a way out for him. However, in the middle of the conversation, her brother couldn't bear it anymore. He accused her of speaking in a pushy tone. When Zahara heard this, she felt bad. Because all she wanted was to help her brother get out of this seemingly inextricable process. She didn’t raise her voice or accuse her brother. She just tried to remind him that this whole process started many years ago and which decision led to it.

Did she use a bad tone?

Or was her brother just not ready to hear these things?

She remembered a conversation with her closest friend a few days ago. Her friend had problems with her fiancé and wanted to meet Zahara. She couldn't tolerate some of the things she witnessed during their engagement anymore. She wanted to figure out what she should do, and how she should react. So she called Zahara, not just to talk, but to find a solution to this situation. Zahara tried to show her friend the real problem in a similar way. Because she knew that when a person sees the real problem, they can easily find the solution themselves. She reminded her friend not to ignore the difficulties she was experiencing anymore. Trusting the closeness of years, she was able to say all this to her friend easily. But her friend didn't react like her brother. She listened to what Zahara had to say and asked questions about it. At the end of the meeting, her friend figured out how to react and thanked Zahara for being there. But why did her friend not care about her tone while her brother did?

Wasn't her brother closer to her friend? Didn't he react more softly towards her brother and the situation? Then why did her brother accuse her of speaking in a harsh tone but her friend cared about what she said?

When people are not satisfied with the content, they criticize the form.

Her brother only shared all this to discuss with his family. He didn’t ask for help on this issue. He wasn't bothered by the temporary solutions he found himself. Zahara just saw that this issue kept coming up in front of her, even though it wasn't asked, and tried to explain to him that she could solve it. But her brother didn't see this situation as a big problem. So what good would it do to say things he didn't want to hear?

Moreover, because he didn't hear it at the right time, maybe he would realize the truth later. Because he wasn't ready to admit the mistake he made at the very beginning of the process. He still believed he was doing the right thing. And when Zahara talked to him like this, he became even more defensive about his mistake.

Zahara regretted her reaction while thinking about all this. She had wanted to help, but maybe she made the situation even more complicated. So wasn’t she going to help anyone, not going to suggest anything to anyone? No, of course not... But there's a balance in life. Even for those who want to hear the truth and those who don't... Because people want to hear the truth, but sometimes they may not be ready for it...

From now on, Zahara would pay more attention to whom she said what. Before saying anything to someone, she would think, "Does that person want to hear this?" The real measure, "If there's a question, there's an answer," would guide her actions. She would calibrate it better and proceed accordingly...

Experiential Design Teaching uses true information 

to help us transfer experiences to design 

our present and future in a better way.

It helps us to unveil problems correctly 

and offers strategies for better solutions.
It helps us to reach our goals in life 

while being happy and successful. 

The following  programs are offered for 

those who are interested, 

"Who is Who" "Mastery in Relationships"

 and "Success Psychology".